Therapy, Sold On A Dream

When I first got sober back in 1991 I stayed in an isolated state for about a year. I wasn’t very sociable. Yes I had friends and yes I was in a relationship. As a matter of fact, the woman I was in a relationship then is now my wife. Without her being so supportive, I don’t think that I would be where I am today.

I didn’t have much money but had enough to build a makeshift recording studio in a spare room. The studio consisted of a Tascam 16 track cassette recorder and a used sound board. I had an old fender amp and a Peavy pa head. I had invested in an Art FXR sound effects machine that consisted of about 450 programs. For instance, Chorus, Flanger and a digital delay.

What I did after that was just create. For that year I did nothing but write and record. Sometimes I would stay in that room for 12 hours at a time. In some kind of strange way this was therapy for me. I must admit that what I did give myself was the time to reflect on my life and heal my mind.

Think about it, I started drinking when I was 10 years old in 1967 and didn’t look back until 1990. I was 33 years old and a total wreck. For one full year I spent time in a program that I will cherish for the rest of my life. After all, that is what they gave me back, My Life.

On another post I will tell you just how much of a wreck I was.

I wrote this piece while in that isolated state. One day I will post the music that accompanies it.

By the way, if anyone out there has any stories about recovery or any related subject, I would love to have you as a guest writer. Just leave a comment or write me at: blogging@digitalstores.biz After all my goal is to be helpful to others and stories of self destruction are a god sent in helping to educate those who think it’s cool to obliterate themselves

Sold On A Dream

Listen to the sound in my mind
My girl by my side, so very kind
Living day by day, trying to create
Feels so good to know that she’s my loving mate

I’m sold on a dream
Nothing feels so good
Increase my self-esteem
I knew she understood

Moving day by day, pushing towards my goal
Listen to me play, I begin to rock & roll
I know that in my mind, this is where I want to be
Nothing feels so good, makes me feel so free

I’m sold on a dream
Nothing feels so good
Increase my self-esteem
I knew she understood

Listen to the sound in my mind

So I Stare

Here I sit by my window
Watching the world slowly go by
Thinking thoughts of yesterday
I shed a tear and cry

I can’t hear what’s never been spoken
How can you see what’s never been there
These are questions I can’t answer
So I stare

Daydreams are visions; they tell us who we are
You shouldn’t let them pass you by
Hang on to what you believe in
All we have is what we are

Here I sit by my window
So I stare

Interpret This (The Answer)

This is it guys, Here is the full explanation for this riddle. I was hoping that someone would have figured it out but it didn't happen. Some came close but not quite.

Anyway, here we go....

Although I never saw you coming
I was never blindsided by your light

I have received comments in the past that have given me such gratification that I would ride that high for a week. It's hard to explain but I expected a comment from that person but never expected them to be dead on where my thoughts were.

Interpret this

You are not my faithful follower
Yet you follow me around

Enter Social Networking; Lets just use Blog Catalog, Facebook and Twitter for example. You develop a certain friendship with people over time and as you explore other networks, you usually run into some of the same people.

I find you in population
Yet your not there for me

Sometimes you develop relationships with certain people and think you know them pretty well. Well, this is not always the case. I have developed a friendship with some and found out about a dark side that I really didn't want to be associated with. Just my experiences over time.

You devour everything in sight
Yet spew it back as if bulimic

A testimonial of your perception
A tribute to the cause

Think about the Digg Network. Everyone scrambles to grab a story before anyone else reads it. Enter it on Digg and develop new contacts. This is a great traffic builder.

Hindsight is usually your strong suit
Your perception always grand

What is the definition of Hindsight? Perception of the significance and nature of events after they have occurred.

Yet what is this I speak of
Do you really understand?

Keep going!

Yes I heard it through the grapevine
Yes I told you and yours

Yes you gave it back with dignity
Awaiting all its glory

Again think of what you usually write about. Most times you write about what you are thinking about at the time. I have been down this road many times where I read someones post and had no choice but to react to what I read as I was so taken by the subject. You don't really have a choice but to write your own views on the subject.


But who and why, who knows
Perhaps I’ll shine the light

Or maybe you instead
What is this?

OK, OK! You must have figured it out by now. All of this comes down to one thing. This in nothing more than what we are in this cyber world.

We Are Bloggers

The Answer Is BLOGGER

Thank you all! I had a lot of fun doing this. I hope you did also.

Interpret this

I decided to write this riddle for you to figure out. Pass it on to all your friends or anyone you can think of and leave your answers in the comments. I would really be interested in what the final outcome will be.

Pass this on to everyone you are connected with so I can accumulate as many answers as possible. This time next week I will tally all the results and post it here. I will also reveal the answer.

I think this will be a lot of fun and I am curious as to how many will respond with the right answer.

The more that answer will make it interesting to all who read it. Lets see how deep the answers can get. So come on and rally all your friends and lets get some answers.

Although I never saw you coming
I was never blindsided by your light

Interpret this

You are not my faithful follower
Yet you follow me around

I find you in population
Yet your not there for me

You devour everything in sight
Yet spew it back as if bulimic

A testimonial of your perception
A tribute to the cause

Hindsight is usually your strong suit
Your perception always grand

Yet what is this I speak of
Do you really understand?

Yes I heard it through the grapevine
Yes I told you and yours

Yes you gave it back with dignity
Awaiting all its glory

But who and why, who knows
Perhaps I’ll shine the light
Or maybe you instead

What is this?

With And Without

Remembering Old Friends

This piece is dedicated to the remembrance of old friends. I moved to a small town called Rosendale when I was 6 years old. Rosendale is located upstate NY. Just outside of Kingston. It’s a small mountain town and is where my heart still longs for today.

The poem I am introducing to you today is a reflection of that time and mainly about a friend who I grew up with. He has since died and I reflect once in awhile about our life such as it was.

Brian was my best friend. We hung out, cut school, partied and did most everything together. I could go into detail about our life but I think it would take a lifetime to put into words.

Brian died at the age of 27 and the way I found out was a total shock to me. I had moved on, was married and living in Portsmouth NH. Every year I would visit my parents who still lived in the old house I grew up in. I would come for a visit and always visit Brian and his grandmother who he lived with. We would hang out, party and always have a great visit. We would always be the best of friends and always happy to see each other.

To make this story a little shorter, one day I was visiting my family in the summer of 1983. It was sort of a family reunion and I was home for the week. The very first day I was home I had to walk down to Brian’s house. I couldn’t wait to see him. To my surprise someone else answered the door and said the people who lived there had moved away. They said that the guy that lived in the house was found dead from an overdose of drugs. His grandmother found him and had a heart attack and was under the care of a nursing home.

I was in shock to find out the news this way and have never been the same. I blocked it out of my mind for many years until one day when I was walking and started to reflect. Anyway this is what I wrote with my best friend Brian in mind.

Folks, DRUGS KILL!

Brian, if somehow you can read this I wrote this with you in mind.

With And Without

As I walked down the street
Faces, oh so many faces

I turn to greet a friend
But he’s not there

When I turn around again
Faces so strange, unknown
Unlike a feeling I’ve ever known before

Nothing like a friend
To talk to when things are hard

But now you’re gone
It’s hard but I must go on

Even though your not there
I can’t help but think you are
And somehow it makes it all easier

What about this emptiness
A word that is used to describe a pain

Hurting is a teacher
It teaches me to understand

That nothing lasts forever
Nothing in this great big world
Anyone who thinks otherwise is a lost cause

Why am I here
A question I ask myself

What is my purpose
A reason for me to live this way

I was born of this world
I will live of this world
I will die of this world

Here’s to long lost friends